Story Love Mastery For Autism Parents
Why Your Child’s “Obsession” with That Character is Actually a Love Letter
By Stuart McGhie, Autism Father & Founder of Connecting Hearts
Last week, we stepped into your child’s art gallery.
We learned to see the masterpiece in the mess and the profound communication within Creation Love.
We discovered that when our children are building, arranging, and creating, they are sharing their inner world with us.
Today, we journey from the art gallery into the library, the movie theatre, the very heart of the narrative.
We are going to explore the second of the five Universal Love Languages: Story Love.
Does your child watch the same movie on repeat, until you know every line by heart?
Do they carry a specific character figurine everywhere they go?
Do they live and breathe the world of a particular book, TV show, or video game?
Most of the world labels this behaviour an “obsession.” A “fixation.” A “perseveration.” It’s often seen as something to be managed, limited, or redirected.
But what if I told you that this intense focus is not a bug, but a feature?
What if it’s not a sign of being “stuck,” but a profound act of emotional processing and a deep desire for connection?
What if that “obsession” is actually a beautiful, complex love letter written in the language of Story Love?
What is Story Love?
Story Love is the use of narratives, characters, and worlds to understand emotions, process experiences, and connect with others. For a child who doesn’t communicate with words, stories become an essential toolkit for navigating the complexities of human feeling.
Think of it this way: characters in stories are like emotional avatars.
They experience big feelings—joy, sadness, anger, fear, love—in a way that is safe, contained, and repeatable.
By watching a character navigate a challenge, your child can explore those same feelings within themselves from a safe distance.
When your child is deep in Story Love, they are saying:
• “This character feels what I feel.”
• “Help me understand this big emotion.”
• “Can we connect over this story? It’s important to me.”
• “I am the hero of my own story, just like them.”
Their intense focus isn’t a rejection of our world; it’s an invitation into theirs.
A world that is rich with meaning, emotion, and opportunities for connection.
The Hero in My Living Room
For a long time, my son was utterly captivated by Buzz Lightyear.
He carried the toy everywhere. He watched the movie daily.
He would act out scenes, making the “swoosh” sound as Buzz flew through the air.
My initial reaction was frustration. “Enough with Buzz Lightyear!” I’d think. I tried to introduce new toys, new movies. I saw it as a limitation, a rigid behaviour I needed to broaden.
But then I shifted my perspective. I put on my Story Love detective hat and asked, “Why Buzz? What is he getting from this character?”
I watched the movie with him, not as a tired parent, but as a student. And I saw it. Buzz is a character who believes he is something magnificent (a real Space Ranger), even when the world tells him he’s just a toy.
He is brave.
He is loyal.
He is a hero who, despite his own confusion and challenges, always tries to do the right thing and protect his friends.
My son wasn’t “obsessed” with a toy.
He was studying heroism. He was exploring loyalty.
He was connecting with the part of himself that, despite any challenges, knew he was magnificent.
When I stopped trying to pull him out of his story and instead stepped into it with him, everything changed.
We weren’t just a dad and his son anymore. We were two Space Rangers on a mission. And we had never been more connected.
How to Become a Master of Story Love
Are you ready to enter your child’s favourite story and connect with them on a whole new level? Here are three practical ways to master Story Love.
1. Become a Fellow Fan
Instead of resisting their favourite story, join it. Learn the characters’ names. Watch the movie with them. Read the book. Show genuine interest. Your enthusiasm validates their world and makes them feel seen. You’re not just tolerating their interest; you’re sharing it. This is a powerful act of love.
2. Be a Story Detective
Get curious. Ask questions, even if your child doesn’t answer with words.
Your genuine curiosity is what matters.
• “I wonder if Elsa feels lonely in her ice castle?”
• “Wow, the Hulk must be feeling really angry right now.”
• “It looks like Thomas the Tank Engine is being a really good friend.”
By discussing the characters’ emotions, you are giving your child the language and framework to understand their own feelings. You are becoming their emotional translator.
3. Co-Create a New Story
Take their favourite characters and create new adventures. This can be as simple as making up a story out loud, drawing a comic strip together, or even using AI tools to create a personalised comic book with your child as the hero alongside their favourite character.
This act of co-creation is a beautiful fusion of Story Love and Creation Love. You are honouring their world while expanding it, and creating a brand-new story that belongs to just the two of you.
Story Love is your child’s invitation to connect on the level of the heart, through the universal power of narrative. It’s a chance to see them not as a collection of behaviours, but as the hero of their own epic journey.
Next week, we will tune into the vibrant frequency of Rhythm Love Mastery, and learn why your child’s “stimming” is actually a sacred dance.
Ready to Become a Storytelling Co-Pilot?
This is just the first chapter of understanding Story Love.
In the Connecting Hearts book and course, you’ll get a complete guide to your child’s narrative world, including:
• How to decode the emotional themes in your child’s favourite stories.
• A step-by-step guide to creating your own AI-powered comic books together.
• How to use stories to help your child navigate challenging real-life situations.
What is your child’s favourite story or character right now?
What do you think they might be exploring through it?
Share your story detective insights in the comments!
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